A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

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What's 5+7? Piccillo

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Chuck Norris died.

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what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

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Penis!

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SC Johnson a Family Company

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How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

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Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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That's Racist

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why did hannibal lector butter up the teacher? he wanted to get a good grade. he also wanted to eat her

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas ? Cancer

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How do you make a Mexican parade? Contact members of the Latin community and inform them of your wish to organize a parade celebrating their heritage.

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cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

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Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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