This is you cat This is just cat This is wasted cat This is your cat This is time cat This is reading cat This is this cat Now read the third word of every sentance

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What iz stupid? Hibiyav

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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what do you get when you cross a pig with a bunny? Nothing.Crossing a pig with a bunny is impossible.

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Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

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What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

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D is for diabetes, Cookie Monster, if you keep this up.

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Why did phil krahn go to the store? To get one of those suits

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How do you make a fat kid cry? You hold an onion up to their face.

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Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

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What did the person say to the person about to run into the tree? Watch out for that tree!

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Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

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Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

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What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

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How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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R2-D2 is quite possibly the most vulgar character on the set of Star Wars. Every word he says is bleeped out.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

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Q: What do starving children in Africa eat? A: Nothing

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chuck norris is meeeeean to pain.

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Why did the manager fire his black employee? Because he was stealing office supplies. Why was he stealing office supplies? Because he needed the money for his family. Why did he need that money? Because he wasn't being paid his full wage. Why wasn't he being paid full wage? Because his employer was a racist. Upon this analysis, the state of California ruled the case of Jones vs. Smith in favour of Mr. Jones, and ordered Mr. Smith to give Mr. Jones a cash settlement of $500,000. However, Mr. Jones was still convicted with a single charge of petty theft and was sentenced to six months in prison. His family was still awarded the settlement of $500,000. Mr. Jones made parole three months early for being an "idol inmate."

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A drunk man walks out of a bar, goes home and abuses his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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