slow down! you move too fast. you gotta make the morning last. just tripping down the cobblestones. looking for fun and feeling grovvy.

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

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Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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There's some good news and some bad news. The bad news is there isn't any good news.

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Why did Obama win the president election He had a greater amount of votes that Jonh mccain

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What happened september 11th, 2001 It was my first time snorkoling in Hawaii

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When god hands you lemons .. you find a new god.

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what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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What happens when you put a bunch of Republicans in a room together? They form a caucus.

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why didn't bobby eat breakfast? because i stapled his head to the floor

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When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

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Hi Jacob You cool

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A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

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What did Squidqard say to Spongebob? Shut up.

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A woman comes at the doctor.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van

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What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

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ha.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

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Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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What do you call a black man digging a hole in the ground with a body covered in blood, bruises and stab marks next to him? An gardener, he uses a different type of fertiliser.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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