What's wrong with shooting an african american? Everything, it's murder.

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What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

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Womens' rights.

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Women's rights.

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

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There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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whats black and yellow and makes you smile? a bus full of black people going off a cliff. do you shame is? there was three empty seats.

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Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

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One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

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What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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Yo momma's so fat and thank god because I'm a chubby chaser.

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LOL. It's East vs LA and Durant

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What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

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why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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