What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

Why did the penguin go to the cookie shop? He didn't, penguins don't eat cookies

What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

What do you get when an Asian and a black person have a baby? Black and yellow. Black and yellow. Black and yellow. :)

How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

What smells like marjuana and is black? A black man smoking weed

What's a ghost favourite colour? Ghosts don't exist.

What does a black man, an Asian Man, and a Jewish Man have in common? They are all men.

Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

How are cherries and kittens different? They're both fun to cut up.

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

I cant think of one (._. )

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

Du bist mein Kampf

What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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