How are cherries and kittens different? They're both fun to cut up.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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How many Wal-Mart employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, assuming he can reach it safely.

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How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

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yo mama is so fat she went to the doctor and the doctor told her she had diabetes

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Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

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What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

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Why did he walk the dinosaur He took an arrow to the knee so much the DJ didn't was paper-plates.

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Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

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Star Wars

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What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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