yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses? Because they often have to interact with violent and distrustful criminals.

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

How do you make a kids fall off a swing? Throw an axe at them

What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

How do you make a fat kid cry? You hold an onion up to their face.

Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

Take my wife- to the store.

What's black and white and red all over. Half a zebra

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

Whats worse than jackass 2.5? Jackass 3-D

Whats worse than the holocaust??having a downstndrome for a child

What did timothy say after he went to go golf? - I just went golfing

An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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