roses are red violets are blue last time I saw u were in a zoo don't worry ill be there to not in a cage but laughing at u

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When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

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Sex. That is all.

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A. Wanna Hear a funny joke? B. Yes! A. The WNBA.

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DON'T expect the unexpected, you don't want to KILL the unexpected ;-)

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Sit on Santas lap Boner

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What did the old man say? Nothing he was so old he died.

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Women's rights.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game.

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What is Earth made out of? Earth

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A man went into a bakers to buy a loaf of bread. The baker said 'What can i do for you sir?' The man said 'Id like a loaf of blue bread please.' Baker replied 'Sorry sir we only sell brown or white here.' 'Thats ok.' said the man, 'I have my bike outside.' [This joke was made up by myself and my school friends in 1975 age 15. We all told it for years - i still do - and cried with laughter whenever we heard it. We called them non jokes :-) ]

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What do you call a supporter of Barrack Obama? A welfare recipient

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? genocide whats worse than genocide? getting raped by a giant scorpion

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I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

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How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? 17

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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How come Michael Jackson can draw a perfect circle? He likes little BOYS.

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why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

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Guy 1: Yo dawg Guy 2: DID yOU JUST FUCKING CALL ME A DOG>/?>/???? Guy 3: Yea

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Whats Black and hangs from a tree? A Tire(:

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a man walks into a bar, and says "can i get a beer please?" the bartender hands him his beer, and as soon as the man starts to take a drink, the man dies of a massive heart attack because of his unhealthy lifestyle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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