What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Why couldn't JImmy walk to school? A:Jimmy is in a wheelchair.

Yo momma's so fat and thank god because I'm a chubby chaser.

why didn't the black kid make the basketball team? He has cancer.

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

What walks on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and one in the evening? A dog that plays in traffic all day.

How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

Why did the chicken cross the road? As this question does not provide neccesary information, a plausible answer cannot be found.

-Knock Knock. -Come in.

roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

Hellen Keller

what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

minced oaths

Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

How do you kill a retard? Slit his throat.

Nathan Gooderson.

Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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