A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

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69

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Why was Steve buried in Australia? Because he was dead.

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You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

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Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

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Q:What did the policemen say to the other policemen? A:Safe

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What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

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What did the racist wife give to her black husband on their anniversary? Golf clubs because he liked to golf.

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A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

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A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

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what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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Penis.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you call a group of Mexicans crossing the U.S. border? A travel soccer team.

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Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? As this question does not provide neccesary information, a plausible answer cannot be found.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops