An Irishman, a Mexican and an American sit a test. They all pass.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: How do you fit 20 babies into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What is so funny about a dog chasing his tail? A: The dog cannot figue out that it his own tail, and every time he moves so does the tail. Therefore never reaching a satisfying end for the mentaly chalanged mutt.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do magnets work?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

girls are a lot like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -1

And I want you like Anne Frank wanted ... nobody to read her diary. Cuz, like a diary is a collection of secret things that no one else reads, that's the whole point of a diary. Millions of people have breached this little girl's privacy after she was chased by Nazis. Kick her while she's down.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Fear in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He said to himself, there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's Magical Basement. Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So i walk in my house after drinking that night.... my wall is green

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worst that the Holocaust? Another one.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Type 17 diabetes. Hepatitis R. Pubic Lice. Just Pubic Lice.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What does wasabi spell backwards? Ibasaw

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the white man kill the black man? Because he was a racist that didn't care much for black people or their ways.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor. The results came back, and you have brain cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what r the two best ways to describe a guy whose eating a bannana while peeing, time conservative and a multitasker

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the boy die at his Halloween party? He was the victim of a drive-by.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock, Knock Who's There. You. You who. You are you. WTF!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock Knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? How dumb are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

imadewords

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I don't like movies. Because ticket prices are overwhelming.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops