How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? 17

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Why was the little boy sad? Because a stranger stole his shirt.

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What did the man bring home from Africa? AIDS.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tied to the first monkey.

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A man went into a bakers to buy a loaf of bread. The baker said 'What can i do for you sir?' The man said 'Id like a loaf of blue bread please.' Baker replied 'Sorry sir we only sell brown or white here.' 'Thats ok.' said the man, 'I have my bike outside.' [This joke was made up by myself and my school friends in 1975 age 15. We all told it for years - i still do - and cried with laughter whenever we heard it. We called them non jokes :-) ]

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours being in a zoo But don't worry I'll be there too Behind the bars, laughing at you

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Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

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What flys? A fly

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, the sky is grey so is the grass everything is grey, as i am colourblind

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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Q: What's worse than being fat? A: Getting even fatter than u already are. :o

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WTF BOOOOOM

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Me.

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What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

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how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from sky-scraper Q:he dies

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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You are reading this.Ya you the fat one

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"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

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Why couldnt Jimmy swing on the swing? because Jimmy's a fish

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"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

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What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops