What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

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I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

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Knock knock (No one is home)

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Why do all black people have nightmares? Beacause we killed the only one with a dream..

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

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My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

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2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

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What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

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The Holocaust

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There once was a rose that was red Violets are blue Knock Know who's there? Man I gotta quit huffing glue

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Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

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Friends are like trees. They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

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h

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First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

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How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

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Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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