Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

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A woman went out and had a great time with her friends. Then she walked home alone and got viciously raped by 4 large black men.

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Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

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What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

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Why did the 15 year old girl not enjoy her taco? Because the man making her taco was kid napped and replaced with a female that forgot to put cheese on it.

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How Do You Get Your Mom To Shut up? You Kill Her.

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Not much of an anti joke but here we go... - What do you get when you cross a jew and a potato? - A Baked potato!

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Why did the boy hate his bicycle and soccer ball he got for Christmas? The boy didn't have legs. He also hated sports. By the way he was black but that doesn't matter, he still hated sports. Who in the right mind would give a cripple inappropriate toys? Probably a racist Santa Claus. Oh by the way, Santa Claus is not real. So did they return the presents after the boy found out what it was? Yes, and it turns out the boy got a guitar and piano instead. Too bad the boy is also deaf.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

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Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

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What's better than winning at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

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Why did LeBron James up and bail on Cleveland? He thought there was a greater opportunity for postseason success by playing in Miami.

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Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

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Q: why couldn't the pirate boy get into the movie? A: the movie was rated R and the pirate boy was only 14 years old, and he didn't have any adult supervision, which prevented him from entering the movie.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? I don't Know, but we should inform the RSPCA.

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a Ford Taurus stapled to his face.

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If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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What's wrong with four black people in a cadillac driving off a cliff? The Cadillac holds 5

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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