So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

BOOBIES!!!!!!!

Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

what do you get if you cross a cat with a cat? kittens.

Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

Why couldn't little Johnny drive the tractor? Because he had no arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because he was a potato

An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

A Jew sits down next to a muslim at the bar. They great and discuss their day's events, they both order beers. Then they go home.

Doctor: Knock knock... Patient: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor... Patient: Interrupting doct-- Doctor: You have cancer.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

Your mother is so stupid she never finished College thus having to work many menial jobs to provide for her family.

Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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