Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

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Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

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Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

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Why couldn't Simon run? Because he had Cerebral Palsy.

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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Why was Steve buried in Australia? Because he was dead.

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Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

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That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

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How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

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why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her statement.

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What's big white and cant climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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how do you kill jesus? with a knife

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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