Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

Q: Why did the horse put on cologne? A: He wanted to smell nice.

A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

BOOBIES!!!!!!!

What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

alert("The Game");//

Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

Where do rabbais go to shop? At the supermarket like everyone else.

What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

omg this doesn't work 1.hold breath for 5 minutes 2.die it doesn't work cause you would just knock yourself unconconsiuse and your body will start breathing for you again until you wake up

A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...