How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm horny and your bodily figure is very attractive Get naked

if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

Knock, Knock Knock, Knock Knock, Knock No One's home.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

My mom.

How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

why couldnt helen keller drive? because shes a woman.

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

Why was the baby crying? Because a tree fell on its legs.

What is red and not there? No tomatoes.

BARRACK OBAMA.............WHAT A JOKE!!!!!

Whats funnier than a jew holding a nickel. Nothing. Jews are cheap.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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