onranges are orange bananas are yellow and apples are red/green ................... and im ................. PINK (lw/kc)

the website says jokes, yet these are all facts.

Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

Knock Knock It's Open!

What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

Q: What is so funny about a dog chasing his tail? A: The dog cannot figue out that it his own tail, and every time he moves so does the tail. Therefore never reaching a satisfying end for the mentaly chalanged mutt.

What do you call a group of black people? You don't You call the cops first.

What do chicken babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

Q: why did the little girl cry on Christmas? A: because she got a dead cat.

What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

what's worse then droping your phone. 9/11 having sex with the holocaust

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...