Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

-What's the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage. _________________________________________________________________ -What's the difference between 1,000 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't use a pitch fork to move my Lamborghini.

Knock knock. Who's there? Ben. Oh hi! come in.

Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because he's Chuck Norris, silent because his butthole is extremely loose

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a big dick, Now suck it you fucking bitch!

Why was Jim gay? Because he liked penis.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin... Nothing they are muffins.

What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

Whats something thats red and swings A baby on a meat hook

What did Batman say to Robin befor they got in the car? Get in the car.

What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

Why did the math teacher cry during 6th period? He was held at gunpoint.

Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who is s***ing in my garden?

Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

What is this a book??!!! What am I supposed to do...... READ IT?????!!!!!!!!!

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The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

A horse walks into a bar the bar tender says hey you cant be in here you are a horse so the horse leaves.

Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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