How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

96

What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

Jokes are funny.

What's better than Westboro Church? Committing over 9000 sins.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

Do you know why your mom is so bold? Becaus she's got cancer

What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

What is brown and sticky?

what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

why did Max cry??? chicken

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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