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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What has 5 legs, 4 eyes, and 8 stomachs? Nothing.

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Anne Frank.

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what do you get when you mix a bever and a racoon? A bevecoon!

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Why did a monkey fall out of a tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of a tree? Gravity. Why did the third monkey fall out of a tree? He was stapled to the second monkey.

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Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

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A Jew, homosexual and Irishman walk into a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community.

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Okay on a scale Casey Anthony to Jerry Pandusky how much do you love your kids?

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

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Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

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What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? Nay.

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- Why a black man can not jump? - Because he broken his leg.

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why did the boys voice get so deep? He just went through puberty

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

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What do you give a Penn State waterboy for Halloween - Candy

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

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theres safety in numbers? tell that to 6 million jews

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Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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