How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

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John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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How do you kill a fly? Shoot it

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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How many penguins does it take to cover a dog house? Purple, because the Ice cream has no bones.

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roses are red, violets are violet

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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Where's my tractor?

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Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

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How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

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what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

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How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

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Stevie Wonder has put on a lot of weight since the 70's. I feel really bad for him because he can't watch what he eats.

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I have no ideas.

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A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

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A man and woman are out to eat on their first date. When the woman goes to pay, the man explains that he will cover the cost of the meal. That's a good thing because the woman didn't actually have any money. This happens all the time.

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Why are black people so good at sports? Because there black.

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What is big and white, not the moon CC

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Baseball

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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