what do you call someone who kills jews? a life saver

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You know what they say about men with large feet? Large shoes.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

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what to you call a black person that flies planes? a pilot YOU RACIST

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the adult movie? He had just spent the last of his money at Ihop with his friends, and is now regretting ordering two Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruitys when he was really only hungry for one.

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brett is a dick

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

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whos gay? you are

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A blonde, the pope, and a young kid are in a crashing airplane and there's only one parachute. But by the time any of them equips it, the plane hits the ground and they all die.

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whats a worse movie than saw I don't know my mom won't let me watch any

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Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

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Poop

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why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

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Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

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The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

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how do you spell ugly ? U G L Y.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree ... Because it was dead

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Yo mama is so fat, she is thinking of going on a diet.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

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So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

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i love antijokes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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