Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

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My friends are like trampolines I have none

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Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris

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I like my woman like I like my coffee. Good.

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A jew, a catholic and an atheist are in the desert. They see a dusty lamp. They take it and rub it. Once the lamp is clean, they put it back on the sand and kep walking.

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A black man, a jew and a racist walk into a bar, The racist proceeds to be a racist

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what did the monkey say to the breast cancer?

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A man and a chicken walk into a bar... I forgot the rest of the joke .... YOUR MUMS A WHORE

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

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Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

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What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

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A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

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Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

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Why is Alex Mann Fat? Because he doesnt eat healthy food.

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Two black guys jump off of a building; who falls first? The one that jumped first

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Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

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What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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