helen keller's dad put a plunger in the toilet and left it there. helen then went to use the bathroom....

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Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

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How many Grand Jurists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on if it was a cop that snuffed out the light bulb.

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings. whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 beestings

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there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

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Why is Digimon better than Pokemon? It has a better story and character development.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

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what is black and white and red all over a shot to death zebra

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Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

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like for a handjob.

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what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

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What happens when you stab a black man? An equal race rights protest.

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What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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42.

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Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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