How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

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Q: What is the most common question among children? A: How are babies made?

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

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You won't put that in your ass.... No shit.

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

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Knock Knock Come in

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Knock Knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? How dumb are you?

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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Obama is a black man living in a white house. TEEHEE

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Once upon a time there was a girl who was going out with a boy 2 years older tan her. He was 16 and she was 14. Does it make him a pedo? cause everyone says he is.

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Q, Where did Rebecca Black go to eat? A. TGI Fridays

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Roses are black, violets are black, i am blind!

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What is worse

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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what do snozberries taste like? Lama

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

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Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

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What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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Sex. That is all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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