3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

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Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

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If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

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Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

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"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

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Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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What did the bird say to the squirrel? Chirp

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Kah-________-

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What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

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Bill is at a bar with a couple of his college buddies. He notices another one of his friends, Jim, who has his back faced to him, and calls him. The man turns and it is not Jim. Bill apologizes and they carry on with their lives.

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What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

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What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

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Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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