What did batman say to robin befor they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

What's better than Westboro Church? Committing over 9000 sins.

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Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

What do you call an indian who is underwater? A scuba diver.

A black man walks into a predominantly white bar and is laughed at hysterically, the man is a world class comedian.

What did the racist wife give to her black husband on their anniversary? Golf clubs because he liked to golf.

Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? They threw a fridge at her.

You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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