Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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Hellen Keller

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This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

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How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Chuck Norris died.

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What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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What did the black kid get for his birthday? A bike, just what he asked for.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

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Roses are bacon Violets are red I have a gun I'm not very original.

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Anne Frank.

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What did the man from Hiroshima see when he looked up at the sky on August 6th, 1945? Some birds.

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why did the boys voice get so deep? He just went through puberty

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Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Two young men ignoring societies expectations of them and instead choosing to play the sport they enjoy the most.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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