How any blondes dose it take to screw in a lightbulb? 3 one to hold the light bulb and two to rotate the ladder

What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

What do you call a black man that is working on a farm? A farmer.

What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A person with light, yellowish hair who has a tragic genetic deformity.

What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

What's wrong with shooting an african american? Everything, it's murder.

My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

HARRY EFFING STYLES

Beans beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the less at risk you become to such health problems as diabetes and heart attacks. The increased carbohydrates and antioxidant properties maintain a manageable balance for the body's digestive system to maintain a good constant internal environment.

Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

say iphone 5 times then look under your pillow ...nothings there

There is this dylectic who can't spell.

Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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