Q: What do starving children in Africa eat? A: Nothing

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blood is red also Nothing else is blue

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Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

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Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

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why couldnt helen keller drive? because shes a woman.

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a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

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wheres a good place to find funny jokes? anti-joke.com

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset in her backyard Neither did she.

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A white man bumps into an Asian man while walking down the street. They have a brief chat. As they part ways, the white man says, "Facebook me!" The Asian man replies, "Due to my socio-economic situation I cannot currently afford an Internet service." So they exchange telephone numbers.

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Ah dead on it was all Taggart!!!

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

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Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

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I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

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What's black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

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Did you know?

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What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly.

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

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What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

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- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

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How many girls does it take to sell out a Justin Beiber concert? None, all of them are boys.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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