Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

. Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

What do you call a black man that is working on a farm? A farmer.

How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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