Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blood is red also Nothing else is blue

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Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

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What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

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I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

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What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

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What did the priest get for Christmas? Herpes

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What did the young boy get for Christmas? All his brothers belongings because his brother died

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what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

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Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

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Did you know?

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Why is ya dad ya dad? ........ because of ya cousin

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

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solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

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Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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