Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

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What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

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TRUE COMEDY: "HOW ABOUT THAT AIRLINE FOOD!"

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What's worse than locking your keys in ur at outside of an abortion clinic? Going in side and asking for a coat hanger!!

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three men walked into a bar, can't believe know one noticed it.

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What do you call a guy who acts straight but is really not? Verl.

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Flab

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Little Timmy died yesterday

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Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

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What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!

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Who wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy? P. Diddy.

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A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

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whats short and has spots? A mouse with the chicken pocks.

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What's meaty and has a poof? A meatball with a bubble.

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A Jew doesn't walk out of the Holocaust.

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Why did the Nazi not help the black man up after he had been badly injured? The Nazi was in a wheelchair.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

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What did Billy get for christmas? Nothing he died of lung cancer.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell an Anti-Joke.

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- Knock Knock - who's there? - Gestapo! open the door!

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What is black but also yellow? A song.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

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Q: What is black and hangs from a tree? A: Kevin Towers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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