Why did the penguin go to the cookie shop? He didn't, penguins don't eat cookies

Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Left. That one direction...

Q: What is worse than bitting in to an apple and finding a worm? A: Bitting in to a worm and finding an apple.

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

How do u shit With ur ass

Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

what does a nazi and the witch from hansel and gretal have in common, they both put people in ovens.

Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

What do you call a Jew on a rollercoaster? A Jew on a rollercoaster.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having an apple at all. Yet only worms to eat, such as the the poverty stricken citizens of Ethiopia.

what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

Knock Knock No one answers....

roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

Your mom

Hellen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it ERRMMMMM UAHHHHHHHH...

what said the girl when the roof collapsed over her nothing she died

Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

Women's rights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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