how do you kill jesus? with a knife

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

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A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

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Why did my son fall off of his bicycle? Because I hit him with a steak.

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A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

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A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

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What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

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who is lanky? Theo Kingdom

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

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Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

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Do you know whats not funny black jokes that arent racist. You belendo!!!

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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Tim's gay.

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Vagina-Boob

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Why did the dyslexic man walk into the bra, he didn't he walked into a bar.

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One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

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Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

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Knock, knock. Who's there? New Kids on the Block. Wait, who?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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