Why did the dad buy his son some ice cream? He didnt, his dad is dead

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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What did the gay man order at Starbucks? Delicious, handcrafted beverages and great-tasting food. The secret to making life better.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his pig? Wheres my Pig?

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How do you kill a blond wearing a hat? Shoot her in the face.

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Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the immigrants.

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Q: Has your ear operation had success? A: Hotdog with chili.

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whats short and has spots? A mouse with the chicken pocks.

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What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

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If u and I jumped off a cliff..who would land first? who cares..

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A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

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what did the girl do when she saw a spider in her bathroom? she peed.

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a man walked out of church and said F***!

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Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

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What is black but also yellow? A song.

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I only like NY as a friend.

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What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

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What is brown and sticky? A masturbating Negro.

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Sex. That is all.

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How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

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What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

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An indian boy gets a girlfriend

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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