Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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A boss walks into a bar and hires the first man he sees. He fires everyone else, no matter what their occupation.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Sex. That is all.

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What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

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A woman goes to the doctor.....She has terminal cancer.

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You're so gay you actively seek homosexuals relationships.

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I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this dock and it makes me wana quack like what the hell is THAT!

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Whats worse than a bee sting? - Two bee stings Whats worse than two bee stings? -The Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? -Three bee stings

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What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

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Your mom is so poor, she contributes to the high unemployment of the country and didn't even have enough money to feed her family so Social Services came in and took them away

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why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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Lebron Traveled

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why did the mexican cross the road? to catch its bus on the other side

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What's the difference between a black guy and a wet towel? The towel doesn't kick when you hang it

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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What's red and creeps up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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When life gives you: High Fructose Corn Syrup,Citric Acid, Ascorbic Acid,Maltodextrin, Sodium Acid Phosphate, Magnesium Oxide, Calcium Fumarate, Yellow 5, Tocopherol, and less than 2% natural flavours... Make lemonade.

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They give psychiatric patients acting classes in order for them to express and as such heal themselves? Excuse me fucktard! A guy that has deluded himself into believing he is the 11.356th Napoleon does not require further acting classes!

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Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

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Q: Why did the plain crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. By: LV

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Whats worse than receiving a dollar? Receiving a penny.

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What happened to the man that jumped off the cliff. He died....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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