How do you confuse a blonde? You tell em a AntiJoke!

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

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Why did my son fall off of his bicycle? Because I hit him with a steak.

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What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Dr. Dick Howard Long visits a friend in England. Arriving at his friend's house, he knocked at the door. A butler then lets him in and asks, "Sir, would you like to wait while the Master bathes?" The doctor then replies, "Sure thing, I'll wait until he's done."

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Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was thrown out of the way

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Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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what do you get when you cross a pig with a bunny? Nothing.Crossing a pig with a bunny is impossible.

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Period Blood

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What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

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A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

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What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

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cory is gay

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

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why did the chicken cross the road? to give a doctor the cure for cancer but some ass hole ran him over

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What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

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Why Do Indians Not Like Snow? Because it is white and on their land

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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