Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

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Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

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Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One jew to screw in the light bulb.

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How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

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How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

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Hellen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it ERRMMMMM UAHHHHHHHH...

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 was racist.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

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Knock knock. Come in. Okay.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

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If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Q:whats the diffrence between a mexican and a deer A:one is a mexican and the other one is a deer

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What iz stupid? Hibiyav

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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