A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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you know what they say about people with big feet, they have big feet...

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

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Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

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This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

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Why couldn't the boy see his sick mother? Because he was blind

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What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

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What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

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Baseball

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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What's the difference between a white guy and a black guy? Their skin color.

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How do u shit With ur ass

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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Chaney is a dumb b****

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why did the boys voice get so deep? He just went through puberty

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Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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