A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers have no feelings.

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

Knock, Knock... Who's there An abandoned baby

What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

What did the boy say 2+2 was? 4

1234 5

Do thumbs down me likes in this anti joke website?

What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Why Was a guy wearing Pink pants? Because He Was Gay.

Oh. So his name's Brandon.

Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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