Patrick is gay

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What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

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Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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Knock knock Who's there? What.

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

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There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

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Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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What is brown and sticky?

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Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was both deaf and blind and both senses are essential to a driver

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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Q: What did the rectum say to the Anus? A: "Your a waste."

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How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

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What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

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what's the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? That she should train harder for her next boxing match, or find a less physically demanding hobby to partake in.

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing? Answer - A gay homosexual

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A seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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