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Q. what did the refuge from uganda say to his mom when he was riding his bike A. look ma no hands.....

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

What did the Queen of England say when here servant died? Another one bites the dust!

Star Wars

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

dog

Q: why did the little girl cry on Christmas? A: because she got a dead cat.

Two Jewish kids walked into a bar... mitzvot.

what do you call a bear on a unicycle? improbable.

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

Where do cows go on the weekend? The slaughterhouse.

Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? I don't know. I wasn't there.

what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

What did the gay man order at Starbucks? Delicious, handcrafted beverages and great-tasting food. The secret to making life better.

what to you call a black person that flies planes? a pilot YOU RACIST

Q: Has your ear operation had success? A: Hotdog with chili.

Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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