A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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Did you know why people actually fear clowns? Because slapstick humor is dead

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

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What walks on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and one in the evening? A dog that plays in traffic all day.

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What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

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How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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Microsoft Windows

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

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Hellen Keller

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-Knock Knock. -Come in.

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Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

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The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

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Whats worse than HIV? AIDS

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What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

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Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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25

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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