Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

knock knock, who's there, white, white who, white van, RUN!

How many times does it take a blond to start a car? Usually once; however, the weather may have an impact how well the engine will spark.

A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

A blonde, the pope, and a young kid are in a crashing airplane and there's only one parachute. But by the time any of them equips it, the plane hits the ground and they all die.

Q: What is black and hangs from a tree? A: Kevin Towers

Why did the manager fire his black employee? Because he was stealing office supplies. Why was he stealing office supplies? Because he needed the money for his family. Why did he need that money? Because he wasn't being paid his full wage. Why wasn't he being paid full wage? Because his employer was a racist. Upon this analysis, the state of California ruled the case of Jones vs. Smith in favour of Mr. Jones, and ordered Mr. Smith to give Mr. Jones a cash settlement of $500,000. However, Mr. Jones was still convicted with a single charge of petty theft and was sentenced to six months in prison. His family was still awarded the settlement of $500,000. Mr. Jones made parole three months early for being an "idol inmate."

If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

Why are there no Mexican people on Star Trek? Because the casting director screened thousands of actors and actresses and assembled what he/she felt was the most talented cast to create and sustain a long running television series. Unfortunately no one of Mexican dissent was awarded a role.

Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

chuck norris is meeeeean to pain.

So a blonde was trying to peel a banana, but she couldn't because she was viciously attacked by chimpanzees and had all her fingers bitten off

what do an black ,am and a bicycle have in comman there both objects

ballsack

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Wanna hear a joke? My penis size.

A llama walks into a pub. Actually, he didnt, because it is physically impossible for a llama to stand up and proceed to walk over 2.8 feet. That stat was a lie.

What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

A 36 year old Canadian woman.

What did the African boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he celebrates Kwanza.

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a completely legit reason dumbass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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