"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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Women's sports.

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Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

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Q: What happens when you throw a green rock in the Red Sea? A: It gets wet.

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why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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GONNA

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

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Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

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holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

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An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

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What do you call an indian who is underwater? A scuba diver.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

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What did the Sony guy say when he hit the golf ball? PS FOUR!

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There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

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memes

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Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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