How do you get a bear out of a tree with cheese? Camembert.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Hitler was Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset in her backyard Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

thumb_up thumb_down +9

2

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So dont touch it

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Did you know?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops