A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they get married and live happy together for the rest of their lives.

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What would Billy Mays do if he were alive today? Yell.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, Knock. Who's there? ........Chicken...?

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Womens rights.

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. jack fell down and broke his crown, and is now in intensive care.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2.

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What do you get when you cross a Shake Weight with Parkinson's Disease? You get a sentence that doesn't explain the end of the joke and leaves you without any closure.

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how do you teach a baby to walk? cut of its hands.

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Obama is a good president.

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What's the difference between a carrot and an elephant? The carrot is orange.

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whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? i don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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What's worse than 4 black guys sitting in a Jeep that goes over a cliff? They were my friends.

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How many muslims does it take to screw in a lightbulb. One.

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uio iu o p uoi p ui o p uio p uio p u io p uio p u io p uio p u iop u ok ghjlk hjkl hjkl jkl hj l hjkl kj l jkl hjkl hjlhjlhjkl l jh ot7843646 56 5 6 356 ghj hkj yj fg tj g d g d fgs dfg f sdgfs gdf gh fg dfhg rthgrth gfh fgh gh df h fgh fd hdf gh f hg et y er y ery ery ery r hfg h fb dgh rtu e tu k ryi k tyu e ry7 6 34 65 3 3 657 f g fb bn dfhs ah w t u y u eytu ye iu r6u uy reytkjnld;kafjgdsfjgsd fg sdf ghjsdfkhj sdfhjs dfjh sdf;hjsdjfh;k dfhjsdf hsfdjh sdfjh sdfjhsjdfdjh sdjf h fdhj dfl;jhsjdf hjs dfjh sdjfh sjdf h;ljsdf;lhjs;dlfjh sdfjh sd;fjh;lsdfjh sdfljh sdflhjs df;ljh sdf;hj ;dsfljhsdl;hj sdf;lhjsd fhj fds;lhjsdf ;lhjs d;lfhj df;hj sdfl;hj;ldfsjh ;lsdfhj sd;flhj fdhjsdf ;lhj sdf;lhjsdf;lhj What what in the buttt????????

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mitchell likes balls in his mouth.

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OMG I NEED FRESH WATER

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why was the guy crying at the bar his house got bombed

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123

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Once upon a time, there was a pair of headphones. It loved the sound of music.

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What did one dolphin say to the other? Nothing. It was dead.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on a deserted island when a genie appears and offers each of them one wish. Before making any decisions on what to wish for, the discuss what the smartest choice is. They return to the genie. The brunette wishes to return home, as does the blonde. The redhead wishes to be able to walk again. The genie denies the wish because to walk again she would have to wish for two legs. The genie leaves and the redhead eventually dies of dehydration as she cannot move and the water that she reaches from the ocean contains salt which dehydrates her faster than the water hydrates her.

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Two black guys and a Latino were walking down the street. One of the black guys says to the Latino, "You have some lint on your suit." The Latino brushes it off and says, "Thank you. I have an important meeting with the board of trustees this afternoon, and it would have been embarrassing if I had lint on my suit."

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why are fire engines red? well books are red magazines are red 2 two plus two is four four times three is 12 there are 12 inches in a ruler queen elizabeth was a ruler, queen elizabeth was also a ship, ships sail in the sea fish swim in the sea, fish have fins, fins fought the russians, russians are always red, fire engines are always russian. and THAT is why fire engines are red....

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Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice carton? She was trying to read the nutrition label and had forgotten her reading glasses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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